Captain Piss Gums and His Pervert Pirates

(Believe it or not, there is actually a story behind this! My father briefly attended the University of Tennessee during the 1971-1972 school year. While there, he told me of this underground hippie publication called "Captain Piss Gums and His Pervert Pirates." There was apparently another one called "Son of God Comics.")

Captain Piss Gums and His Pervert Pirates                               October 13, 2004

Well, Cappy, this is gonna be sappy, 

This tribute from me to you, 

But you made all the collegians so happy 

Through your subliminal messages, true. 

I'll always remember my adult days young 

When I marched to the beat of your drums, 

And when this song has been sung, 

Everyone will then know of Captain Piss Gums. 

Captain Piss Gums and his pervert pirates, 

They spoke words true. 

They were not a stupid bunch of gits 

But icons who grew and grew. 

Those bad brainiacs they told us about, 

About how they controlled our minds; 

All this, he told over a stout, 

Thank you for teaching us never to wear blinds. 

"To arms! To arms!" Cappy called out, 

"We must fight the evil establishment. 

We must take it to them; we must take that rout; 

We shan't pay another red cent." 

And so Cappy and the pirates and the collegians 

Drew from their sheathes their blades, 

And attacked those patricians, those enemies of the plebeians, 

And they thus got good grades. 

When all was said and done, put to bed, 

And the psychedelia returned, indeed, 

We pledged our loyalty to Cappy, his pirates, and said, 

"It couldn't have been won had we not you to read."